I am frequently asked what I think is the # 1 rule in Networking. First of all, I’d like to define what Networking is. Most people make this very complicated and I’d like to simplify it by bringing clarity to its definition.
Networking is simply “connecting with people”. On this little planet, we call Earth where there are about 6.4 billion of us, you will have to connect and communicate with people to achieve success in anything you do. The best way to connect with people is the # 1 rule in networking and success. I like to call this G7 or Give, Give, Give, Give, Give, Give, and Give again.
A better way to describe this is Netgiving. “It is the season” to focus on Netgiving.
Many people often ask me what I mean by “Give”. When I talk about giving, I mean the Attitude of giving. When you meet with another person or group for the purpose of networking or meeting, you generally fall into the trap of’ “What can I get out of this?” You should have an Attitude of “What can I give or do for this person?” How do you think that meeting will go with a Give Attitude?
“The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”
– Gandhi
There are many kinds of giving we can offer to make a connection. One of my favourite “gives” is listening. We are born with two ears and one mouth, so use them proportionately. Listen twice as much as you speak. Ask good questions and listen. Every good negotiator, sales person, marketer, lawyer etc. knows this. Get people talking about themselves and what’s important to them. Then watch the magic happen.
Another great “give” is to compliment people, but it must be genuine. How do you think a meeting will go when you start it off with a compliment?
Here is a great “give” - putting people together. Introduce two people who can mutually benefit from getting together. Mutually is the key concept here. Send them an e-mail to introduce them to each other. Be the matchmaker. I consider myself a bit of a matchmaker and call this the e-mail dating game. I do it all the time. People will love you for this.
Consider giving books. Qualify first to see if they are readers. One of my favourite books to give away besides my own is “Oh the Places You’ll Go”, by Dr. Seuss. It is fun and a great book on life. It reminds us of many life lessons in Seuss’s own brilliant way. “Don’t take yourself to seriously, no one else does”. I tell my audiences this all the time. Take what you do seriously, but when you take yourself too seriously then arrogance creeps in.
It’s not easy giving all the time; it takes practice. But once you have mastered this philosophy, you will always be in the giving mode. You will always have the Giving Attitude.
“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.”
- Winston Churchill
Other obvious “gives” are money and time. What are some “gives” you would like to share that have made a difference for people?
Tim Cork, NEXCareer
Author of Tapping the Iceberg